Family Law

Benefits of an Oklahoma Uncontested Divorce

An uncontested divorce is where husband and wife can reach a decision as to the terms of the divorce without having to fight it out in court. While no divorce is truly “uncontested” in the sense that there are no disagreements, these disagreements do not always have to be resolved in court.

Compared to the protracted litigation usually involved in contested divorces, an uncontested divorce is simpler, much quicker, and far less expensive. Uncontested divorce offers you and your spouse the opportunity to remain in control and end your marriage quietly and with dignity.

Believe it or not, you and your spouse do not have to yet agree on every issue for an uncontested divorce to be right for you. It’s not so much a question of agreement as a desire to minimize the legal expenses badly enough that you are motivated to stop fighting, stay in control, and work together as you end your marriage. If you and your spouse do not yet agree on each and every issue of your divorce, that just means you have some negotiating to do. Mediation can be a useful tool to help you and your spouse find common ground on the difficult issues facing the both of you.

The most obvious advantage of uncontested divorce is its cost. Generally, an uncontested divorce that stays uncontested is almost always the least expensive way of getting divorced. I’m a big believer in finding the least expensive way to divorce. The simple fact is that any money you can avoid spending on lawyers is money you can use for living expenses after the divorce.

Low cost is not the only advantage of uncontested divorce. If the level of conflict between you and your spouse is currently low, uncontested divorce offers a way to keep thing on friendly terms.

An uncontested divorce is also more private than a divorce battle waged in open court. The terms you and your spouse negotiate and file with the court will be a matter of public record, but the disclosures and proposals made during negotiation can remain private, unlike the dirty laundry aired in open court.

Another positive attribute of uncontested divorce is that a divorce decree can be obtained much more quickly than in a contested divorce. In Oklahoma, if there are no children of the marriage, a divorce decree can be issued within ten days of the filing of the divorce petition. If minor children are involved, there is a ninety day waiting period. On the other hand, an average time to complete a contested divorce case would be closer to twelve to eighteen months or maybe longer depending on the complexity of the case and the level of cooperation between the parties.

I represent individuals in uncontested divorces in the following counties in northeastern Oklahoma — Tulsa,  Creek, Mayes, Muskogee, Okmulgee, Osage, Pawnee, Payne, Rogers, Wagoner, and Washington. If you believe that you are a candidate for an uncontested divorce, call me today for a free consultation. I can draft the necessary documents and guide you through the court process.

Oklahoma Uncontested Divorce Lawyer

If you and your spouse both agree that divorce is your best option, and you are able to communicate effectively with one another in order to resolve the important legal issues involved in your divorce, you are prime candidates for an uncontested divorce. An uncontested divorce requires that both husband and wife have discussed and settled issues such as custody, visitation, child support, property and debt division. If you and your spouse are able to resolve these issues yourselves without a court battle, you will avoid the high stress and high cost associated with a contested divorce.

To that end, I will be charging $600.00 for an uncontested divorce without minor children and real property and $750.00 with minor children and/or real property. My flat fee is based on the amount of time I have projected I will spend in meeting with you, preparing the necessary documents, filing the documents at court, and attending necessary court hearings. Please be aware that you are also responsible for paying the court filing fee, which is currently $187.30. If a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO) is necessary to divide a pension plan or retirement account, an additional $750.00 will be charged.

When I mentioned meeting with you, I did not necessarily mean we would need to meet in person. While I am happy to schedule an in-person consultation, many of my clients do not live in the immediate Tulsa area. For them, it is more convenient that we exchange information and documents either through normal mail or by using email and PDF attachments. In fact, I encourage all of my clients to use these communication methods in working with me on their case. This will not only save you time and travel, it will enable us to be in contact with each other on an almost daily basis. I will also provide you with updates on your case as things are happening so that you will know what stage your case is in at all times.

I represent individuals in uncontested divorces in the following counties in northeastern Oklahoma — Tulsa,  Creek, Mayes, Muskogee, Okmulgee, Osage, Pawnee, Payne, Rogers, Wagoner, and Washington. If you believe that you are a candidate for an uncontested divorce, call me today for a free consultation. I can draft the necessary documents and guide you through the court process.

Oklahoma DHS settles lawsuit regarding its negligence in death of toddler

A federal judge in Tulsa gave approval last Friday for a $160,000 settlement in a lawsuit that was filed against the Oklahoma Department of Human Services after the 2005 scalding death of a 2-year-old Tulsa boy.

The lawsuit filed by the child’s grandfather, alleged that DHS was negligent for failing to remove the boy from his father’s care despite previous reports of suspected abuse.

For more on the story click here.

Source: Tulsa World.

Another Example of Oklahoma DHS Abuse

Seems to me that every month brings another story of either abuse or incompetence on the part of the Oklahoma Department of Human Services (OKDHS). The most recent installment in this saga has OKDHS turning upside down the life of Tulsan Michael Thomas. In falsely accusing Mr. Thomas of fathering a Lawton woman’s child, OKDHS turned a blind eye to the negative results of more than one paternity test, filed false reports with the court, and took money to which it was not entitled through garnishment of Mr. Thomas’ paychecks and interception of both his federal and state income tax refunds. OKDHS’ harassment eventually forced Mr. Thomas to drop out of college and forfeit a football scholarship. Mr. Thomas is now represented by an attorney and DHS says that it hopes the matter can be settled short of litigation. You and I as Oklahoma taxpayers better get ready to write a big, fat check to Mr. Thomas to compensate him for OKDHS’ latest episode of abuse and incompetence.

Click here to read more about this story.

Source: NewsOK.com.

How Our Adversarial Legal System Complicates Divorce

What I am about to say does not apply to a small minority of divorce cases - those where spousal abuse or child abuse is involved, or where one spouse is a control freak, etc. But for the vast majority of divorce cases, minimizing involvement with our court system is the way to go. You can believe that the advice I am giving you is heartfelt because as an attorney, it certainly is not self serving for me to advise people seeking a divorce to avoid seeing a divorce lawyer early on. Based on my personal experience, it is my opinion that the courtroom is the worst possible place to resolve marital problems.

Our adversarial legal system is much better equipped to resolve contract disputes and personal injury claims than it is to settle marital dissolution. Generally, litigating divorce matters only increases the animosity and hurt on both sides. Our adversarial legal system is based on argument and conflict. Each side’s goal is to win, to beat the other side. Emotions spiral out-of-control and as far as strategy and tactics are concerned, all becomes fair in love and war. This is a pitiful way to resolve marital disputes.

Instead of starting the divorce process by visiting a lawyer, sit down and talk rationally with your spouse. If the two of you can amicably reach an agreement on all necessary issues, such as child custody, child support, division of assets and debts, etc., I can guarantee that you will be much, much happier in the long run. By resolving matters on your own, you remain in control of your life. This will certainly lead to a better emotional state for yourself and will help to reduce the financial cost associated with divorce.

If you and your spouse cannot agree on the terms of the divorce, I would suggest that you need a mediator more than a lawyer. Inability to reach agreement is usually more about hurt feelings than legalities. Before you run to a divorce lawyer, be mindful of the fact that the more disagreement and fighting there is, the more money you’ll be paying in legal fees. In mediation, you and your spouse will sit down with an unbiased third party who will help you and your spouse reach an agreement. The mediator is trained to help balance bargaining power, to prevent bullying, to keep the discussion on point, and to assist you in reaching common ground.

Once agreement has been reached, you can draft the necessary legal documents and represent yourself in court, or you can hire an attorney to draft the documents and walk you through the legal maze for a reasonable fee.

If you live in the Tulsa metro area, and need representation in an uncontested or agreed-to divorce, feel free to contact me for more information.

3 Different Styles of Divorce Lawyers

In my years of divorce practice I have seen lots of lawyers handle divorce cases.  There are as many different styles as there are different lawyers.  But, I have also noticed three recurring styles of lawyer in particular.  I call them the lamb, the pit bull and the fox.

Lamb
The lamb is the lawyer that just sort of goes with the flow. They are reactive, not proactive. They want to avoid confrontation at all costs and that means they also want to avoid going to court at all costs, even if it means convincing their clients to settle for significantly worse terms than they should. The lamb may even be afraid to try the divorce case. He will rarely, if ever, tell his client that he should not sign a settlement offer that is being extended from the other side even if that offer is clearly inequitable. Thankfully, there are not a lot of lambs that last very long as divorce lawyers.

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Pitbull
Much more prevalent is the pit bull, who is exactly the opposite. They hate to settle cases. In fact, some of them won’t do anything proactive to try to settle their divorce cases. It is almost as if they take some type of perverse joy in seeing the “blood running in the streets.” The truth is that often they do this simply to develop and maintain a reputation as “Bad Bad Leroy Brown…baddest man in the whole damn town.” When a spouse is angry and in the emotional stage of wanting to exact revenge, they want to be the name on everyone’s lips when that aggrieved spouse asks their neighbor who is the meanest SOB in town. And, so they work hard to maintain that reputation because it makes them a lot of money.

The sad part is that acting like a pit bull is rarely, if ever, in their own client’s best interests. Of course, the pit bull’s main concern is not their client. If you know anything about pit bulls, you will know that they are very aggressive and vicious. But, they are not thinking animals. They act only on instinct.  When they fight, they not only destroy the dog they are fighting, but by their own actions hurt themselves and anything else around them (which often includes their own clients and their clients’ children).

The pit bull is aggressive for the sake of being aggressive, not for any long-term benefit it brings their client. Often people going through divorce will think they need an aggressive lawyer to represent them in their divorce. They are wrong. What they need is a lawyer who is assertive. There is a difference. It is the difference between the pit bull and the fox.

clear

Fox
The fox is wise and cunning. He sees the big picture. The fox is assertive when he needs to be, compromising when it benefits his clients’ long-term best interests, and always aware of the many different consequences his actions have on his clients. He stands on principle. He is an aggressive advocate for his client when it promotes his client’s long-term best interests.  He recognizes that reaching a fair settlement is always preferable to trying the case and leaving it up to the judge. Yet, he also knows that if a fair settlement is not forthcoming, then he must be willing and able to prepare to effectively litigate the case in court.

When choosing a divorce lawyer, you should avoid the lamb and the pit bull at all costs.  Instead, find yourself a fox.

Source: Alabama Family Law Blog.

Source for post: Georgia Family Law Blog.

Mom Kidnaps Children From Dad

Here’s a story about a father who was awarded sole legal custody of his two young boys due to the mother’s history of alcohol addiction and child abuse. However, the mother kidnapped the children and fled to Egypt after what was supposed to have been a brief unsupervised visit.

Source: FoxNews.com.

Court Denies Paternity Despite DNA Proof

A sharply divided Kentucky Supreme Court recently denied paternity to a man with DNA proof supporting his claim to be the child’s biological father. The Kentucky high court based its decision on the marital presumption which bars any attack against a child’s legitimacy. Read this Time article for more information. Oklahoma is one of the 33 states mentioned in the article that allow attacks to the marital presumption but only within the first two years of the child’s life.

Source: Time.com.

It’s Time To Bury The Billable Hour

William Wilson, author of the Indiana Family Law Blog, read yesterday’s post regarding Scott Turow’s article on hourly billing and was inspired to sit down and write concerning his perspective on the billable hour system. I highly recommend that you take the time to read Mr. Wilson’s post in its entirety. 

Famous Lawyer Says The Billable Hour System Must Die

Attorney and best-selling author Scott Turow says in a recently-published article in the ABA Journal that the billable hour system is not merely bad for the lives of
lawyers but is worse for clients,
bad for the attorney-client relationship, and bad for the image of our
profession. Read Mr. Turow’s article in its entirety here